Comments on: What Parents Need To Know

By: Handout for Parents of Students in my Small Group « VolunteerYouthMinistry.com

Tue, 22 Sep 2009 01:05:42 +0000

[...] iPhone ApplicationSaddleback Church RefineryGetting a Running Start as a New Volunteer Youth WorkerWhat Parents Need To KnowGuest Post: Youth Ministry Prayer Guide – by Matt BaxterGearing Up For the Purpose Driven Youth [...]

By: Tom

Tom — Thu, 17 Sep 2009 01:17:25 +0000

#2 and 3 are great comments because I think sometimes parents feel that when you work with youth all leaders are as immature and silly as the students. I have seen that once parents understand you are safe, responsible and not a knucklehead, parents are a lot more at ease the leader(s).

Tom Pounder
http://notamegachurch.wordpress.com

By: How Does Saddleback Church Do Small Groups? « VolunteerYouthMinistry.com

How Does Saddleback Church Do Small Groups? « VolunteerYouthMinistry.com — Thu, 10 Sep 2009 22:02:42 +0000

[...] Posts What Parents Need To KnowTethering My iPhone 3Gs to My Laptop for WiFiVideo Interview: Marla Gives Advice For New Volunteer [...]

By: Jeremy

Jeremy — Thu, 10 Sep 2009 19:27:36 +0000

This is really an excellent post. I found it through Adam’s blog. 5 Excellent things

By: 5 Things Parents Need to Know from Your Small Group Leader « More Than DodgeBall

Thu, 10 Sep 2009 03:53:01 +0000

[...] over on Volunteer Youth Ministry just posted some great small group training on his approach to working with parents of his small [...]

By: Dennis Beckner

Dennis Beckner — Wed, 09 Sep 2009 03:52:43 +0000

Good question. I don’t believe it’s the small group leader’s responsibility to tell parents everything he knows about their child if it’s not illegal or life-threatening. There are some issues students will work through with the help of a leader and never let the parent in on it. I’m sure that will enrage some people, but some things can be dealt with that way. If there’s a major character flaw, the student is hurting himself or somebody else, being hurt or abused or is involved in something illegal, then it needs to be dealt with through the student ministry staff and the family. At times, professional counseling, authorities or medical treatment may need to play a role. As a volunteer, I always keep the high school staff in the loop if the issue falls under any of these categories.

Thanks for your thoughts.

By: Nick Arnold

Nick Arnold — Wed, 09 Sep 2009 03:42:24 +0000

You bring up a good point: There is an obvious tension between leaders’ relationships with students and their parents. There’s a need to balance the trust of both students and parents.

For example, what if you know a student is doing something that the parent would disapprove of (that is not life threatening)? Is it wrong to hold that back from the parents? What if they find out you knew and didn’t tell them?

Or what if you did tell the parents and the student no longer trusts you?

This is what I do on occasion, it might be a bit manipulative, but I’m not sure what else might be done: I usually “play dumb” and try to tell the parents without actually telling them.